4 Signs Your Husband May Be Having an Affair

Infidelity in marriage can have devastating consequences for both spouses in the marriage. If you suspect that your husband may be having an affair, there are signs to look for. By paying attention to their behaviors, you may be able to stop an affair from happening and devastating your marriage.

4 Signs Your Husband May Be Having an Affair

If you see one of these suggested behaviors below, it’s essential to say something and express your concerns to prevent your suspicions from becoming a reality. Please don’t wait until it’s too late. Here are four signs your husband may be having an affair.

Secretive Texts

If your husband is texting secretly or becoming more possessive about his phone or whereabouts, he may be having an affair. Another sign your husband may be keeping secrets about whom he’s texting is if notifications do not pop up on this phone. If your husband once had notifications that would pop up and you could see who texted him, but now you can’t, that may be a sign that he doesn’t want you to know those to whom he’s talking.

If you find this is the case, ask him point-blank to whom he’s talking. If he is elusive or you suspect he’s lying, ask to see his phone. Check any suspicious numbers or names that seem foreign to you. While there should be trust in every relationship, if you suspect the person is acting differently than usual, it may be best to ask the question and see how they respond. Couples who have been together a long time know when the other person is lying.

If the husband does not let you see the phone, this will confirm suspicions that something is up, and he is hiding something. Give them consequences for their actions and let them know that certain behaviors, including intimacy, will not happen until you see the phone.

There is No Explanation as to the Whereabouts

If you find that your husband is spending more time at work or needing to be at work late at night or on weekends, your husband may be having an affair. It may be legitimate, your husband may be working late to make extra money, or because the boss demands him to.

However, look at your bank account. If you find that the amount of money that’s coming in does not match the amount of time that he’s working, your suspicions that he’s having an affair may be legitimate.

First, confront your husband. Ask him if he is seeing someone else or is genuinely at work. Call his work and talk to his boss if you don’t believe his response. Ask him if your husband is working late and what he is working on, or you can call a coworker and ask them the same question. Coworkers and bosses will be clueless about what’s happening, and their lack of knowledge regarding what you’re doing at work might help confirm your suspicions.

You may also have to take it one step further and follow them to work to make sure that’s where they’re going. Stay there for a short period to see if they enter work and if they stay there. If you continue to be suspicious, ask to have a tracker app put on your phone.

Live 360 is an app that allows you to track your family members’ whereabouts. This is great for teens who are learning to drive or have not been trustworthy regarding their whereabouts. The same goes for a spouse. You can use it to track where they are and see if they’re where they are. If they refuse, then you know something is not correct.

Increased Lying

Spouses who commit adultery will often change their stories. They may tell you they’re at work until eight one day, then they were there until nine. These discrepancies in time may make you feel suspicious about how they spend their time. More than likely, they won’t engage in a big lie. There will often be white lies that you will catch.

Additionally, people who are lying often change their story. Listen carefully to what your spouse says. If they change their story from one week to the next, confront them and ask them exactly what you remember. Ask for a pay stub if they tell you they’re at work. Ask to see if their money has increased since they last worked. There may also be ways to check their whereabouts, such as time stamps or cards they must stamp to go to work.

If you suspect your spouse is cheating, it is essential to be direct, open, and honest with them. More secrets will not help the relationship; confrontation and confession will. Their cooperation is essential in fixing the marriage. Let them know what you will do so it is not secretive or duplicitous. The simple act of following them or tracking their whereabouts may be enough for them to end the cheating.

More Arguments/Conflict

Spouses who feel guilty about cheating on their wives may engage in more conflict. They may seem more moody or snippy when confronted. If you find you are having more fights, it may be a sign that they feel guilty about something. They may even take it one step further and accuse you of cheating. If that is the case, be direct and show them every line of communication that may indicate this is the case.

Demonstrate your faithfulness and then ask them to demonstrate the same. If they cannot, your suspicions may be confirmed. Ask them to seek professional help and find a person to talk to. Seek the help of a pastor or leader in your church who may be able to help with the situation as well.

Discern whether your conflict results from issues that need to be resolved or because of guilt from your spouse. You may find that you are fighting more because you are dealing with other circumstances that are causing trials in your relationship, such as financial hardship or health crises.

If this is the case, ask him calmly what’s going on. Ask him why they are feeling defensive and upset with you. If they can’t pinpoint the reason, ask them to ask a friend to help them identify what’s going on. No relationship can withstand a lot of conflict.

Conflict is natural and healthy, but it will become unhealthy quickly if it can’t be resolved. A spouse who wants to nitpick about everything has deep issues that must be resolved. These issues can be personal, but they can also be about you. The best way to fix them is to ask them what they’re feeling and what you can do to help change it. If nothing helps, despite your confrontation, your spouse may be having an affair with someone.

The best way to discover this is to ask them. It is better to confront them directly and deal with the consequences than to deal with the additional pain and betrayal of finding out about an emotional affair that’s occurring behind your back.

If your spouse wants to honor you, he will come clean and tell you what is happening. Chances are, there is some issue going on. You don’t want to suspect them of infidelity if that is not the cause. However, it can be the cause if your spouse is way more argumentative than they have been.

Infidelity can have devastating consequences for everyone involved. If you suspect any of the above behaviors, directly confront that person’s behavior immediately. If they don’t confess, ask them to prove their innocence. If they cannot, your suspicions may be confirmed, and you may need to take drastic steps to heal your marriage.