What It Feels Like to Have Postpartum Blues
Stacy Davis
As complex, interesting, frustrating, talented, and everything in between as we may be, there is one thing all people have in common, and that’s the fact that we were all born of a woman and are all a miracle given to the world by God. The psalmist loudly proclaims:
For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. – Psalms 139:13-14, NIV
There is likely no greater joy than the creation of a new life. It is something joyful, marvelous, and mysterious even though we know so much about how human beings are conceived and developed in utero. Though the process of carrying and giving birth to a child is often anxiety-inducing, not to mention painful, there is joy in the aftermath.
Understanding postpartum blues
Welcoming a child into the world is meant to be a joyful occasion – after all, a new human being is alive and among us. However, while that may be the experience of the majority, it’s not that way for everyone.
Postpartum blues, which is another way of talking about the “baby blues” is a common problem that affects a lot of women. Baby blues affect anywhere between 50% and 75% of women after delivery, and they usually begin within the first 2-3 days after delivery and may last for up to two weeks.
There are some similarities between the baby blues and postpartum depression; however, the symptoms of baby blues last about two weeks and are less intense than those of postpartum depression. Typically, the symptoms of baby blues will disappear on their own without treatment. With postpartum depression, the symptoms last weeks or months, and the symptoms are more severe than those of baby blues.
Up to 15% of women who have baby blues develop postpartum depression, so it’s important to speak with someone if it appears your symptoms are persistent and making it difficult for you to take care of your child.
Some factors increase a woman’s risk for postpartum depression, and these include:
- A personal or family history of mental health problems such as depression.
- Mental health problems during pregnancy.
- Having limited social connection and support.
- Being younger than twenty or a single parent.
- Recent stressful life events such as the loss of a loved one.
- Psychological or physical trauma such as domestic violence and abuse.
- Having marital or relationship conflict.
- Having a baby with special needs or a baby who cries frequently.
- Feeling ambivalent about the pregnancy.
- Having complications with the pregnancy such as a difficult delivery or a premature birth.
What it feels like to have postpartum blues
Postpartum blues affect many women, and though it is unpleasant, it typically goes away within two weeks after giving birth. If you have postpartum blues, you will often feel weepy and had frequent and prolonged bouts of crying without an identifiable cause. You may also experience the following:
- Sadness.
- Anxiety.
- Feeling fatigued.
- Feelings of guilt.
- Feeling overwhelmed.
- Have trouble sleeping.
- Have sudden mood swings, and emotional highs and lows.
- Feeling irritable.
- Problems with your appetite.
- Reduced ability to concentrate.
- Have trouble caring for your new baby.
These feelings run counter to what one might expect, and that adds to the feeling of distress or that something is wrong. Sometimes, mothers with postpartum blues will feel like they’re not good mothers, and that can compound feelings of guilt. While postpartum blues may be distressing and frustrating, you must find support and ask for help from friends, your family, or your partner.
Postpartum depression will feel something like postpartum blues, but the symptoms of depression are more severe. If your symptoms or the symptoms of your loved one include the following, or they persist beyond a couple of weeks after delivery, it may be postpartum depression which will require treatment.
Reach out and ask a doctor or mental health professional for help. Some of the symptoms of postpartum depression to look out for may include the following:
- Having frightening thoughts such as thoughts of harming yourself or your baby persistent feelings of sadness and low mood.
- Severe mood swings.
- Having difficulty bonding with your baby.
- Finding it difficult to take care of yourself and your baby.
- Withdrawing from contact with other people, including family and friends.
- Changes in appetite, including experiencing loss of appetite or eating much more than usual.
- Having severe anxiety and panic attacks.
- Issues with sleep, including struggling to sleep at night and feeling tired during the day, or sleeping too much.
- Lacking energy and feeling overwhelming tiredness and fatigue.
- A lack of enjoyment and loss of interest in the wider world, including less interest and pleasure in activities you used to enjoy.
- Feeling intense irritability and anger.
- Feelings of hopelessness, worthlessness, shame, guilt, or inadequacy as a mother.
- Trouble thinking clearly, concentrating, or making decisions.
- Feeling restless.
- Recurring thoughts of death or suicide.
Seek help immediately if you see these symptoms.
Finding help for postpartum blues and depression
The birth of a child is typically an occasion for joy. That joy is often intruded upon by postpartum blues, or postpartum depression which is more severe. Because of the expectations that surround birth, feeling depressed or the baby blues after your baby’s birth may carry the added weight of disappointing those expectations. A new mom may be reluctant or embarrassed to admit that she’s feeling down, and not reach out for the help she needs.
Postpartum blues and postpartum depression are common, and nothing to be embarrassed about. Reach out to your support network, let them know what’s going on, and allow them to come around you during this time. The symptoms of postpartum blues will go away on their own within two weeks of delivery, and your support network can hold you down and support you during that period.
As postpartum blues and postpartum depression are similar, it’s important to call your doctor or healthcare provider as soon as possible if the symptoms you experience possess any of the following features:
- They aren’t fading after two weeks.
- They are getting worse over time.
- They make it difficult for you to care for yourself and your baby.
- They make it hard to perform and complete everyday tasks.
- They include thoughts of harming either yourself or your baby.
Depression can have a significant impact on your health and the well-being of your baby, as well as your family. Postpartum depression can last up to a year after the delivery. It’s important to get help as soon as possible if you think you might be depressed, as the symptoms may last for months or worsen over time.
The good news is that the postpartum blues will go away on their own after a couple of weeks, and with the right support, most people make a full recovery from postpartum depression. For both postpartum blues and postpartum depression, you can help yourself by talking to your loved ones about what you’re feeling, and about what they can do to help you with the baby and lighten your load. Taking care of yourself is important, and it includes:
- Making time for yourself to enjoy hobbies.
- Resting whenever you get the chance during the day.
- Getting as much good sleep as you can at night.
- Getting regular exercise which you enjoy, like walking or swimming.
- Eating a healthy diet such as a Mediterranean diet.
If you are diagnosed with postpartum depression, there is help available in the form of talk therapy, and medications such as antidepressants. Antidepressants may be recommended if your depression is severe or other treatments have not helped. Your doctor can prescribe medication that’s safe for you to take while breastfeeding, and that has minimal side effects.
“Mother and Daughter”, Courtesy of Wesley Tingey, Unsplash.com, Unsplash+ License; “Mother and Baby”, Courtesy of Hans Isaacson, Unsplash.com, Unsplash+ License; “Mother and Child”, Courtesy of Ben Iwara, Unsplash.com, CC0 License; “Changing Baby”, Courtesy of Natalia Blauth, Unsplash.com, Unsplash+ License