Four Ways Anger Can Be a Good Thing
Texas Christian Counseling
Anger is a powerful emotion. It is one of the most common emotions, especially during challenging circumstances. People tend to become angry when a situation is out of their control or a situation does not deliver a favorable outcome, despite prayer or other pleas for help.
However, there are only a few resources out there that help people understand how to control or resolve their anger. These resources often treat the emotion as a negative issue that can lead to devastating consequences. However, this is not always the case.
This lack of help causes them to build up their anger and go through the motions of life until a trial or circumstance becomes too much to bear, forcing their anger out, and projecting it onto others or the situation. This projection of their feelings can cause hurt feelings and damage to relationships.
Toxic people who project their anger onto others to get a sense of justice for the wrongs they need to right in their lives can cause damage that becomes irreparable. Victims of this projection will have to exercise forgiveness to repair the relationship.
However, pent-up anger that does not result in outbursts can be good. All emotions are not destructive in and of themselves. It’s not the fact that we have the feelings that become the problem, but what we do with them.
It is essential to know what to do with anger. However, if a person is still dealing with the emotion but hasn’t acted upon it, it can be good for their emotional well-being. Here are four ways anger can be a good thing:
When it has not resulted in sinful action
Anger in and of itself is not a sin. However, it is how we react to it. Society confuses it with sin. If someone hurts another’s feelings, they believe that person has sinned against them. However, that person has not sinned. It is only when people use harsh or harmful words or choose vengeful actions to get justice for themselves, that is when anger becomes a sin.
It is an indicator that something is wrong in our lives. When we grow into spiritual maturity, we regularly analyze our emotions. Emotional regulation, although not always taught, is an important asset. This skill helps the person to not act upon the anger, but rather resolve it appropriately.
People who have good regulation skills can pinpoint the source of their anger and not allow it to project onto others, making them the victim of that person’s vengeful behavior. If someone finds they are feeling a lot of anger, it is essential to ask themselves why they think this way. Analyzing and pinpointing the source will be helpful so they can seek to resolve it.
Anger is an indicator of a deeper issue
Like the warning sign on a car’s dashboard, when the check engine light comes on, we know something is wrong with the vehicle. Other lights that appear or flash on the dashboard serve as a warning to the driver that the car has a problem that needs to be dealt with immediately.
The light symbolizes a deeper issue. If disregarded, the problem becomes too difficult to ignore. They must take the car to a mechanic to identify and fix the problem or eventually, the car will be rendered useless.
In the same way, if a person does not diagnose and resolve the deeper issue that anger indicates, they will eventually be in crisis. They will also struggle to pursue their purpose in God’s Kingdom because their emotions will be a barrier. By diagnosing the real source of the anger, they can not only resolve their anger but also catapult themselves toward emotional freedom and well-being.
It is resolved in community
You don’t have to deal with your anger alone. Instead, you can seek the help of mature and wise people to understand it better and get ideas on how to resolve the issues causing the anger.
People who don’t know how to deal with their anger tend to project it onto people who are not the source of the problem. For example, people use social media negatively to project their anger onto others. Yet, if gone unchecked, people’s anger can spill over into their work relationships, friendships, and connections. This is especially tough when a Christian does this because it is easy to confuse anger with a poor reflection of Christlike character.
By getting to the root of the anger problem with wise and mature individuals, they can resolve it before it comes out onto others. People who are mature and older and have lived more of their lives. They can relate to your situation and advise on how they were able to resolve similar issues. They can also offer their advice without judgment or condemnation.
Creating a safe environment like this provides a person with an outlet to share their fear or sadness that can be validated. Not seeing the help of others can be detrimental to their health. It is important to be vulnerable and honest regarding anger. Without the help of wise counsel, pent-up anger can become like a dripping faucet; eventually, the sink will overflow, spilling and damaging everything around it.
Anger helps us to seek accountability
In the same way, we need wise counsel to help us pinpoint the source of our anger. Being accountable when we are out of control is also essential. Pent-up anger will eventually spill out somewhere. It’s just a matter of when. Are you seeking an accountability partner, whether in your local church body or a friend or family member? People we trust can be a great source of help.
These resources help us deal with our emotions effectively and not let them get out of control. As with anything in life, anything in moderation is good. However, if overflowing anger has been stuffed and not dealt with appropriately, it will eventually damage a person’s emotional well-being and relationships. By seeking the help of an accountability partner, you can curb that issue before it becomes a real problem.
Getting professional help
Anger can be a destructive emotion if not handled properly. However, it does not need to be managed alone. If you feel like you are being undone by it, there are professionals that can help. Reach out to our office today, and we will schedule an appointment with a therapist in our directory. They can walk with you toward unpacking the issues that fuel your anger and lead you to a place of finding freedom.
“Rage”, Courtesy of Andrea Cassani, Unsplash.com, CC0 License