How to Communicate Better in the Workplace: Four Barriers to Effective Communication

If you have ever seen a good communicator in the flow of expressing themselves, it can be both an inspiring and discouraging thing to witness. Some people seem to be able to express themselves naturally and effortlessly, while others have a host of issues to overcome.

The encouraging news is that learning to communicate better is entirely possible; the first step is learning about the barriers that block effective communication.

How to Communicate Better by Overcoming Assumptions

Words are a small part of communication. People communicate with their personalities, their bodies, and even through silence. We take in and respond to large amounts of information daily without fully realizing that we are wordlessly communicating with those around us.

For example, when a coworker who is normally chatty and vibrant comes into work and they are quiet, withdrawn, and disheveled in appearance, they are communicating something without even speaking. We might subconsciously take note of their behavior, body language, and appearance and deduce that they are struggling today.

They have communicated something to us. How we treat them in response is us communicating back to them. We might be gracious to them, give them space by not engaging in small talk, or we might take the opportunity to ask them how they are.

If we were to observe the changes in them and decide on the reasons for those changes, we would be assuming. It might be a correct assumption, but without asking them simple, non-invasive questions, we won’t know for sure what is going on. Assumptions might be correct, but by leaning on assumptions, we risk being incorrect. There remains a barrier between us and the person we’ve assumed about.

Correct assumptions are just as unhelpful as incorrect assumptions, in some ways. Making assumptions means that there is a distance or a gap in our communication, and we have filled it with an assumption. The stakes for this can be small, as in the case of an unwell coworker, where you might risk coming across as insensitive or invasive.

Sometimes the consequences for making assumptions are massive, though. A boss who makes assumptions about why his team is performing poorly, for example, can lead to him bearing down harshly on people who are simply overworked and exhausted.

The simple way to get around the danger of assumptions is to ask questions. Instead of filling the gaps in our communication with what we presume, we gain information to fill in the gaps. If it is a personal issue with a coworker, this question would ideally be posed in private and with a sensitive tone. If the issue is work performance related, it can be a more direct question.

Overcoming assumptions is simply about asking the right questions in the right way and listening for the information.

How to Communicate Better by Limiting Judgments

Similar to assumptions, we make judgments to fill in the gaps of incomplete communication. However, where assumptions lead to ideas about someone or something, judgments usually lead to an action or an attitude about someone or something.

For example, we might get little positive feedback from our manager about the quality of our work. That might lead us to assume that they don’t like us personally, or it might lead us to make a judgment about their character. We might judge them as being overly critical and unkind, which might in turn lead us to try and avoid them as much as we can.

People carry around biases about certain things and will continue with their judgments until they are challenged. Judgments can be personal, as in the case of the manager who is judged to be overly critical, or they can be general.

People judge others by their age, ethnicity, race, religion, gender, or relationship status. Once again, the only way around judgments is direct communication. It is about asking simple questions and requires us to intentionally lay aside our judgment.

It’s a good idea to make a mental check of the biases and judgments we have. Where it is possible, we should confront these judgments and see how they could be corrected. For example, if we had judgments about people of a different race or religion than our own, we could seek out information or expand relationships and experience to learn.

Even if a person is quite different from us, we can find some common ground that could challenge our biases and improve communication.

How to Communicate Better by Getting Ego Out of the Way

Our communication is affected when we think we are always right. We act egocentrically. In the workplace, this is a common flaw in leadership and management positions. Those at the top of the system may have an abundance of confidence and stubbornness around the way they do things. When they communicate, it can come across as condescending, patronizing, or threatening.

Workplaces often have conflict. When conflict is not dealt with it can affect entire departments. Conflict resolution requires effective communication, and if neither party is willing to accept blame or make compromises, there is often a stalemate. Ego says, “I am in the right, I am owed an apology, and my point of view is the only thing that matters in this instance.”

Much like with the previous two barriers to effective communication, dealing with ego means observing and listening to others. The saying, “God gave us two ears and one mouth” applies here.

The only way to get past a communication stalemate when the ego is involved is to keep quiet, hear the other person’s concerns, and address them with humility. That might mean that we have to drop an issue we deem to be important, but if that’s the best option to resolve a conflict and begin moving forward again, then that is what has to be done.

Masking Behavior

This final barrier is the least volatile of the four. Everyone has masks they wear, depending on the environment and how safe they feel. The naturally expressive person might be more reserved in a work environment, the insecure person might feign confidence, and the person struggling with inner turmoil might mask themselves as happier than they feel.

Masking behavior is a natural defense mechanism. Among coworkers and people who only know us on a professional level, it is easier to present a carefully curated image of who we are. We give people at work access to the parts of our lives that are digestible, efficient, and necessary. This is a natural strategy for many, and it is appropriate for a work environment. However, there are times and reasons to let our guard down, and doing so will improve our communication.

For example, we may have been trying to appear hardworking and dedicated to our boss, but recently find ourselves struggling with the workload. If we were to maintain the appearance of being in control, our boss would assume that we are coping well, and might give us more responsibilities. We might be pushed to the point where we have to meet with him privately and let our guard down a bit, telling him the truth about how we’re struggling to cope.

Sometimes, to communicate more effectively, we need to be honest about what we’re facing and hope that people will have compassion for us.

Getting Help

If you are struggling to communicate effectively at work or in any way, it may be time to seek professional help to get to the bottom of the issue. Meeting with a counselor can help you unpack and learn how to communicate better.

Being in a confidential, judgment-free space with someone who has insight into human behavior might unlock some of your barriers. You might learn more about yourself in the process too. Contact us in person, via phone, or email, and we can connect you with a counselor who can help.