Fear of Missing Out: Exchanging Anxiety for the Delight of Living Your Own Best Life

Whether you intentionally search or aimlessly scroll, you will find evidence of anxiety fingerprinted on the web or anywhere you can find people. Internet ads, reels, or posts reveal the idolatrous heart of our society, often expressed as the fear of missing out.

We have become so addicted to doing more and outdoing one other that we have coined a new phrase for it – FOMO. Fear of missing out, or FOMO, may offer a fresh name, but it is a timeworn issue. It is anxiety derived from trying to keep up with others’ activities and the fear that one is missing out if they do not also do that activity or have the coveted thing that everybody has.

Instead of living richly and in contentment with the abundance that God has given to our hands, we compete and compare instead. Fear and anxiety drain us of the goodness that God has gifted us. We consume time, money, energy, and other resources to keep up with appearances and to match or exceed the experiences of others. Instead of feeling fulfilled, a person feels bankrupt, with nothing left to devote to God and no joy in the gifts acquired.

For all that is in the world – the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride of life – is not from the Father but is from the world. – 1 John 2:16, ESV

Anxiety: fixated on fear

Too often, we decide our value based on the external trappings of this world. We wrongly assign our worth, often comparing ourselves with any and everyone, close or unfamiliar. Peering through the windows of other people’s lives, we somehow believe that we are missing something.

Unaware of others’ internal struggles and challenges, we make assumptions and judgments. Yet, in envy and fear, we try to keep pace with the world around us. Those whose profiles show up in our internet scrolling or real-life trolling will always have something we want: more or less of this or that.

Yet, when we fixate on other people and their lives, we miss the chance to see the good in our own. We forfeit what is already present when we shift focus from God to idolizing what will fade, rust, and eventually decompose. Earth is temporary and so are our bodies. Who we are is far more important to God than our stuff. Our lives are intended to display God’s glory, not merely trophies of the world’s achievements.

Between social media and the values we imbibe from celebrity culture, we transfer our heart focus from what God values to what the world does. This is dangerous territory for believers in Christ because are not meant to be caught up in this world, but rather God’s Kingdom. When we lean toward what society calls worthy, we compromise our own value.

When we downplay righteousness and our belonging with God, we are robbed of our peace and joy. In effect, we trade what matters most for what is destined to wither. This is not God’s hope or design for us. So, why do we place such emphasis and value on these fleeting appearances?

Command those who are rich in this present world not to be arrogant nor to put their hope in wealth, which is so uncertain, but to put their hope in God, who richly provides us with everything for our enjoyment. – 1 Timothy 6:17, NIV

Finding your way out of FOMO

FOMO is idolatry by another name and has been around since the beginning of time. The enemy seeks to uproot all those made in God’s image, luring us into worship of anyone and anything, instead of ascribing our devotion to God. If the devil could persuade Adam and Eve, he will try it with us. If he felt that he could do the same with Jesus, it is certain that he will attempt it in our lives.

Before Jesus ever performed a miracle, the Father was pleased with Him. He announced it through the clouds as Jesus’ cousin, John, baptized Him (Luke 3:21). While it seemed contradictory, the Holy Spirit drove the Messiah into the wilderness for a time of testing. The devil taunted him with all the same human wants that he tempts us. Jesus endured the temptation and was without sin.

His triumph reassures us that we have guaranteed victory in Christ for every trial and every temptation (1 Corinthians 10:13; Colossians 2:15). He taught us how to crush the same enemy who twisted and misused scripture. Christ operated from His authority. He spoke the Word and left no room to entertain the devil’s arguments.

Jesus surrendered His will to the Father. When His assignment intensified, He refused to compromise. He prayed transparently to the Father, confessing that He wanted another way other than the Cross. However, Jesus submitted in everything. Prayer strengthened His agreement with God. He followed through the process of suffering and crucifixion, generating the results of resurrection and reconciliation.

Jesus is our perfect example that reminds us that no matter what the temptation is, we do not have to fear missing out on anything good. We have been blessed with everything we need and the power to obtain it in God’s way. As the Lord develops us through trials, we mature and grow in character and integrity. The Holy Spirit works in us to see from God’s view. What we have with God is better than what we could manufacture by striving in anxiety.

Finding your way into delight

When the enemy tempted Jesus in the wilderness, he promised shortcuts. If Jesus had succumbed, it would have bypassed the sacrifice of the cross and eventual resurrection. We would have missed the teachings, miracles, signs, wonders, and relationships that we read in the Gospels.

These parables and stories fuel and encourage us in our journeys. They fortify our faith, reminding us that because Jesus did the impossible, we can, too, through His strength (Philippians 4:13).

Removing our eyes from the one who loved us first opens the door to anxiety and fear. God wants us to have life transforming adventures and experiences with Him and others. He created an abundant earth that offers a snapshot of the richness He has made available to us.

We may not have the financial budget or the mental, emotional, or physical capacity to do what everyone else appears to be doing. Yet, when we spin and toil, trying to match other people’s lives and experiences, we miss pleasing the One who matters most.

We need to prioritize God’s heart that wants us to experience good things. He is not withholding from us. Delighting in Him sidelines anxiety and brings the desires of our hearts (Psalm 37:4). We need to seek Him first, though (Matthew 6:33). As we align with Him, we increase our desire for His kingdom, righteousness, peace, and joy in the Holy Spirit.

For the Lord God is a sun and shield; The Lord gives grace and glory; He withholds no good thing from those who walk with integrity. – Psalms 84:11, NASB

Next steps

Discover your true identity with the Holy Spirit, choosing to live in that peace instead of the anxiety that drives you to fret about what you are missing. Cultivate awareness of what the Bible has to say about who you are, not just what you do or have. You are chosen by God and accepted as part of His royal family, whether or not you have experienced the latest trend.

The world needs what He’s planted in you. That sort of delight brings transformation and expands God’s Heart into the relationships and environments where you live, work, and play.

Anxiety and fear might want to restrict you by comparing yourself to others, afraid that you will miss the best that life has to offer. Nothing could be further from the truth.

If this struggle sounds familiar, consider reaching out for help. Take a few moments to search our site to locate a counselor. Schedule an appointment with someone who will support you in this journey to exchange fear and anxiety for joy and delight. God has good plans for you, and He desires for you to live your own best life now.