Wrestling With God Over Your Spiritual Beliefs

Even in the best of relationships, things can sometimes take a turn. Whether it’s the fault of one, both, or neither of the people, it quickly becomes irrelevant as tensions escalate and the sense of togetherness starts to buckle under the weight of conflict and ill-feeling. This can happen for many different reasons, and it can happen between siblings, a parent and their child, spouses, or friends. It can happen between a person and the Lord.

C.S. Lewis, who is well known for his clear and persuasive arguments concerning the Christian faith, had his own struggles with faith and God after his wife, Helen Joy Davidman, died from bone cancer. Lewis wrote a book called A Grief Observed in which he explored his loss and how to reconcile it with who he had understood God to be. Throughout the pages of Scripture and history, we see others wrestling with God and trying to make sense of things.

You or your loved one may be going through some challenges, and it could shake your faith or raise significant questions about what you believe about God. Alternatively, life circumstances may be drawing you to seek out deeper meaning and a sense of purpose. Wrestling with God and your beliefs may be hard, but it can revive you and give your spiritual life new meaning.

Ways Wrestling with God Manifests Itself

Wrestling with God doesn’t necessarily mean you are shaking your fist at the heavens. Our rage, disappointment, guilt, uncertainty, or disillusionment about God won’t always manifest itself in an obvious or outwardly showy way. It is often quiet and understated, which doesn’t mean the wrestling or doubt isn’t real; it may just be subtle and even easy to miss.

Wrestling with God might look like struggling to engage in spiritual practices that you previously enjoyed and found refreshing or encouraging such as reading and meditating over Scripture, praying, fasting, reading Christian books, or spending time with other believers. When you’re wrestling with God and your faith, you may find these activities taxing or uninteresting, and find yourself increasingly choosing not to participate.

For other people, when they are struggling with their faith and wrestling with God, they may find that their attitude toward God, other believers, or matters of faith may change. They may find themselves feeling bitter, sarcastic, or snide. They may feel angry, deeply saddened, or even disillusioned by thoughts of God or His people. All this is to say that wrestling with God and one’s faith can manifest in a wide variety of ways.

Facing the Roots of Spiritual Struggle

People who believe in God may wrestle with Him in different ways and for myriad reasons. The life of faith often presents many paradoxes and challenges that aren’t easy to deal with. There may be questions that one has and will continue to have until the Lord returns or they go home to be with the Lord. Some wrestle with God while cleaving to Him, but others wrestle with Him and ultimately decide to walk away.

Someone may wrestle with God and with their belief in God for various reasons, including the following:

Doubts and questions

Uncertainty about God’s existence, character, or His role in one’s life may cause a person to do some serious wrestling. Such doubts and questions may be brought on by going through certain life experiences such as trauma, suffering, or injustice leading to questions about God’s goodness or control over life’s circumstances.

Significant life events or experiences can challenge one’s beliefs, and lead to a crisis of faith.

Seeking authenticity

The desire for a genuine and honest relationship with God, rather than relying on mere tradition or obligation can also lead to wrestling with God for a meaningful connection.

Spiritual dryness or disillusionment

If you are betrayed or exposed to hypocrisy or other failures from a Christian leader or institution, it can lead to feelings of disillusionment with religious institutions and perhaps even God. If you also go through a season of spiritual dryness or disobedience, that can also lead to one feeling disconnected from their faith and questioning their beliefs.

Scientific or intellectual challenges

One’s faith can encounter challenges, and this often happens when one enters a new context different from one’s religious or cultural upbringing. Exploring scientific theories or philosophical ideas that challenge traditional beliefs may result in questioning or rejecting the beliefs and values of one’s upbringing.

Personal relationships and influences

Similar to the above, encountering different perspectives or criticisms from colleagues, friends, family, or mentors can also stimulate questions and doubts about God and what one believes about Him. Exposure to other beliefs or worldviews and having the opportunity to investigate other spiritual paths or philosophical perspectives can also lead to wrestling with God.

Ethical conflicts

One can wrestle with God when faced with a difficult moral or ethical situation in which there’s a struggle with real or seeming contradictions between one’s values and the religious teachings they hold to.

There are many reasons why a person may wrestle with God and question what they have believed. There are dangers is disbelief, and it is wise to remember that there is an enemy who is invested in people not trusting the Lord (Ephesians 2:1-10; 1 Peter 5:8-11). Wrestling with what you believe is a natural part of spiritual growth and exploration. Wrestling well with God can lead to a healthy shift in perspective, as well as a deeper, more authentic faith.

Wrestling Well with God

When you read the Bible, you’ll find many stories that tell us how people wrestled with God and tried to make sense of their own lives in light of what God had said about Himself. We read about Job, who wrestled with God over his suffering and tremendous loss. We read about David and how the blessings promised him seemed far off as King Saul pursued him like a criminal.

Scriptures such as the Psalms, many of which were penned by David, are called Psalms of lament. They show us how to pour out our anguish, doubt, anger, fears, loneliness, and grief before the Lord. They show us how to wrestle well with God, and that we can approach God with our questions, doubts, and uncertainties. Wrestling with God well involves the following:

Being honest and authentic

There’s no use masking ourselves and being pious when we come before God – He knows what’s in our hearts before we express it (Psalm 139). Come before God willing to express your genuine doubts, questions, and emotions.

Being open-minded and curious

As you wrestle, be open to exploring different perspectives, seeking understanding, and being willing to be surprised. Be willing to do a healthy amount of self-reflection and introspection, examining your beliefs, values, and motivations.

Being humble and vulnerable

As you work through your questions, doubts, and anxieties, recognize your limitations and be willing to learn and grow. This might involve engaging in respectful and constructive conversation, where you listen to others as you consider different views.

Cultivating a growth mindset

Challenges and doubts can be viewed not as insurmountable obstacles, but as opportunities for growth and learning more about what you believe and why you believe it.

Being willing to embrace uncertainty and mystery

There is a limit to what we can understand about the God who created everything and whose thoughts and ways are far higher than our own (Isaiah 55:6-11; Job 38-42). Life can often have its paradoxes, and some questions may not have clear answers, or perhaps we may not be able to comprehend these things on this side of heaven.

Practicing spiritual disciplines

One of the lessons from the Psalms of Lament is to let our true feelings and pain be known to God. Grumble to Him about what’s happening, the way David does in Psalm 13 or 22, for instance. As you question things, continue to engage in prayer, meditation, or other practices to maintain and deepen your relationship with the Lord.

Trusting in the goodness and love of God

Another of the lessons from the Psalms of Lament is to look with trust toward God even when things are at their darkest. God has demonstrated His character throughout the generations, and He is loving, faithful, and good (Exodus 34:6-7; Psalm 100). Trust that the Lord is present and that He cares for you, even amid uncertainty.

Seeking guidance and support

You don’t have to walk alone in your doubts, questions, and struggles. You can talk with people such as pastors, spiritual advisors, mentors, or trusted friends about what you’re going through.

You can also reach out to speak to a Christian counselor if you want counsel from someone you’re not connected to who will help you process your experiences and thoughts without judgment. We can help. Reach out to our office today to learn more about meeting with a Christian counselor.